Smart -n-Single Still

Dear L.A. , this is the deal. This guy is really nice, he is from Panama. He drives a really nice car, a Benz. I asked him what he does for a living, and he says he works for himself. I said doing what, and he was not straight forward. He said he does all kinds of things, contracting or something. Didn't seem like it was a complete truth. I asked him again yesterday on our date, and he did it again, the beating around the bush. I don't want to continue to ask him and dig but I need some help. I really like this guy. What do you think I should do?.

Signed,
Smart n Single Still

Mrs. Single Still I have been contemplating on your situation lately and have came to a solutions for your consideration:

However you start any relationship will be the pattern of the relationship. If you start off lying you will continue to lie, If you start off cheating you will continue to cheat, If you start off romancing you will have to continue to romance. And so on. Why? Because consistency in actions speaks louder than any words. And most importantly consistency is what can make or break a relationship. If you have been up front with this guy about your means of employment and things related, he should feel comfortable enough to share his as well. NOW let me also say this, my first rule in any FIRST dating situation is to not disclose to much information (like exact locations of where you work, your address, etc.) about yourself to avoid nut cases and stalkers but since this not your first date, we cool. One thing I do want to share with you before I retreat back to your situation is the "First date must knows”. The most important one is number one; First dates should be solely about getting to know each other (like what you do, your goals, your religious beliefs, etc.). Which means you will go on a date that is preferably in the day time in an environment that is nice (park, cafe, etc.) but also comfortable enough for you two to have a conversation (not a concert, your house, movies, etc.). That way, you and him can decide if a relationship is worth pursuing when the date is over and it also eliminates some sexual temptation. PLUS it’s just always good to be upfront. No one like to waste their time. No one!

Now going back to what we were talking about, I believe you have to analyze if this is the type of relationship or friendship you need in your life. You know, if we as women took inventory of every relationship we involve ourselves in, I believe we would see a pattern of some sort in which could also be the answer to why we are attracted to certain people and except certain things from them. The Bible says blatantly "Do two walk together unless they have agreed to do so?". You must be on the same page (at least in honesty)in order to go forward. Therefore you must consider this; you don't want to be unequally yoked with anyone that you desire a relationship with. Do you?

Girl, I am confident that whatever decision you make regarding this man is reflection of your feeling towards yourself and what you expect in a man. I pray that the Lord guides you in his wisdom and truth. And I hope to hear from you soon to learn the outcome. Continue to be blessed so that you may be a blessing to others.

With love,
L.A. Bonds